This is a difficult question for most of us. Sure, it’s easy to say that we are fed up. But we sometimes erroneously associate being fed up with giving up. As long as you and I are breathing we should never give up.
You have to come to a point in your life when you are willing to draw a line in the sand. A moment that makes you say, “Enough is enough!” And there is no one but you who can decide when that moment comes in your life.
If you are not totally and completely fed up with your weight and your unhealthy lifestyle, then you really shouldn’t waste your time reading this.
Because I know you. You are very much like me. You’ve started many “diets” before and you were so excited the day before you began your diet. You pictured yourself being thin. You dreamed about all of the things that you would do if you were only a lean, mean fighting machine.
You probably even thought of all the people you would like to “accidentally” run into. Yeah, you wanted them to see you. You wanted to be seen and you wanted people to take notice of the new you. Snap out of it, kid. You’re moving way too fast. You first have to have a fed up moment.
Have you experienced your fed up moment? Maybe someone very close to you died as a result of their obesity. Maybe you were left alone and abandoned.
Maybe your doctor just diagnosed you with diabetes or maybe you thought you were having a heart attack.
Perhaps someone made fun of you. Perhaps you’ve never been in a meaningful relationship, and you’re failure to connect with the opposite sex is either directly related to your weight or indirectly related to your low self-esteem as a result of your weight.
Did you try to fit onto a ride with your friends or family at an amusement park only to be told that you were “too fat” to ride?
Did you go to a restaurant with a group of friends and pray to God that the server would seat you at a table rather than a booth?
Many of us who are fat experience these types of moments on a daily basis. Just because these events occur in your life does not mean that you consider it to be a fed up moment. You may lower your head and accept your fate.
Snap out of it. God intends for you to have a meaningful life, and you can’t possibly serve your ultimate purpose when you’re giving in to defeat.
So rather than accept the miserable condition that you are in and react as you have always reacted to the negative events in your life, I want you to rise up, get angry, get focused and accept an opportunity to do something better with your life. Refocus that anger into a concerted effort to revolutionize your health and create a better you. You and I deserve something better than what we’ve been doing.
Don’t confuse your anger for being mad at yourself. I want you to be mad at the situation you’re in and not mad at yourself. And you shouldn’t be mad at yourself. If you are truly fed up, you’re going to change. You are never going back to the old you.
My fed up moment was clear. It was painful. Seeing my mother-in-law on a hospital bed as she recovered from quadruple bypass surgery was a major wakeup call in my life. But my real fed up moment came when my daughter shed tears because of that kid making fun of her “fat dad.”
Get angry! It’s OK. Accept responsibility for where you are. Don’t blame it on your parents. Your genes are not the reason you can’t fit into your jeans. Don’t blame McDonald’s or the buffet restaurant. Don’t blame the food commercials on television. Don’t you dare blame the potato chip makers or the candy bar companies. It’s not your spouses fault. It’s not your boss’s fault. You are where you are in your life based on the decisions you have made.
If you can’t accept responsibility, you simply can’t be helped. I can’t help you. No weight loss book can help you. No celebrity weight loss endorser can help you. No magazine cover of some skinny movie star can help you.
You go to that mirror, look yourself in the eye and say, “I did this to myself. I am where I am because of the decisions that I have made in my life. I blame no other person, thing, or place other than myself. I am FED UP! As God as my witness and with His help and wisdom, I AM going to make a change in my life!”
I’ve shared with you my very painful fed up moment. What is your fed up moment? Have you come to that place in your life? Do as I have done and write your fed up moment down. Place it on your refrigerator. Place it on your sun visor in your car. Think about it every day.
Simply start by writing this “I finally got fed up when . . . .” Trust me. This will be very therapeutic for you.
I finally got fed up when my daughter came to me upset when her friend told her that her Daddy was fat. On that date, I made a promise to myself. I made a promise to my daughter. I made a promise before God. I am changing my life forever. There is no turning back. Abby, you will never again have to worry about your Dad being an embarrassment because of my weight. Oh, I’ll be an embarrassment to you in a lot of other ways, but my weight will never again be an issue.
I made a change. I am changed. I am keeping my promise and I am never turning back. So, where are you at? What are you going to do? Nobody can force you. You have to make the decision. My prayer for you is that every circumstance in your life will lead you to your fed up moment.
If you are there, I hope that you will have the courage to share with me as I have shared with you. Please leave me a comment regarding your fed up moment. I won’t judge you. I won’t make fun of you. I will only encourage you. Let’s make this journey together.
Here’s a few tips to defining your fed up moment:
- Put it in writing. The written word is a powerful tool. Refer back to your fed up moment often.
- Be specific. “I am fed up because I am fat” is not specific. What specifically caused you to wake up and decide to make a change? “I got fed up on December 28, 2012, when I saw a photo of myself that my sister posted on Facebook from our family Christmas gathering. I was eating pecan pie and drinking egg nog. It was at that moment that I realized how I had abused my body. It was at that moment when I saw myself that I finally got fed up and decided to make a permanent change in my life.” Now . . . That’s a specific fed up moment.
- It should be painful. You and I don’t like pain. We do everything possible to avoid it. But this pain, the pain that we experience by being overweight, it should cause us pain. If you’re like me, you don’t have to look very far to find the pain in our condition. The moment you got fed up should come from a painful experience. Find it and stare it in the face. You and I will use this painful moment to transform our lives forever. I don’t want you to dwell in the pain. I want you to learn from it, and to vow never to return to that particular situation again. The next time that a kid tells my daughter that her Dad is fat, that kid will be a liar! My family is drifting very far from the pain caused by my obesity.
- Anchor your fed up moment. For example, my fed up moment involved my daughter’s pain. So, I simply anchor the moment that I got fed up to my daughter’s photo. I keep one on the refrigerator. I have one on my office desk. I have her photo on my cell phone. Each time I look at that precious angel, I am reminded of my fed up moment. I am reminded of the promise I made. Photos make very powerful anchors. What is your anchor?
Once you make the decision to get fed up for life, your world will forever change. You and I . . . We got this!